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Birthmothers describe their experience with Adoption Link
“Before I began my adoption journey, I was more familiar with the concept than most birth parents. My brother and sister were both adopted, as well as my nephew. However, it was not something I ever thought I would be in a position to consider. When I found out I was pregnant with Ethan, I already had four children to care for. My marriage was on the rocks, and the birth father, who was a coworker, dropped out of my life. I had minimal support and a family to think of, so I knew it was time to explore adoption. I opened the phone book and found Adoption Link and called Naomi right away. We had a great talk and Naomi immediately brought me more information.
“I love my adoption story and want those reading it to know everyone’s story is different. In my case, I wanted to pick the family and I wanted Ethan to be their first child. While looking through the adoptive family profile books Naomi brought me, I spotted a familiar face. I dated the adoptive father’s brother in high school. I felt an instant connection to them and saw this as a sign. They were meant to be my son’s parents. Naomi set up a meeting soon after and my relationship with the adoptive family flourished. They attended every OB appointment with me. I really bonded with them and was confident that this was what was best for me and my baby.
“When it was time to deliver, I wanted the adoptive parents there from the time I was admitted to the hospital. I felt like I was giving these two people, who I had really connected with, the most beautiful gift. The next day I left the hospital because I thought staying would be harder knowing Ethan was down the hall. After the adoption was finalized, the communication continued. However, I was becoming depressed. Not only because of my emotions surrounding Ethan, but because I wasn’t seeing the adoptive parents as much now that the pregnancy was over. I knew they were adjusting to life as parents, but I couldn’t shake this feeling of resentment. The adoptive family and I set up a meeting time so my kids could meet Ethan. I had a whirlwind of emotions. Seeing all my children together made me think about how this is what my life could have been and that feeling of resentment was back. However, seeing Ethan with his parents that day prevented those feelings from overpowering me. Seeing how he had bonded with his parents and interact with them reassured me that I made the right decision.
“I do not regret anything and I am so proud of the choice that I made. It was one of the first decisions I made that made me feel like I was an adult and I knew it was a smart choice. It was the greatest thing I have ever done. How do you know it’s right? You don’t but if you feel in your gut that it is the right choice then make it. Since I made my adoption plan, I have helped other birthmothers by telling them my story and attending support groups. I knew my decision was solid from day one, but it is a journey and it doesn’t end once you deliver.
“Last week I met with Ethan and his parents so that Ethan could meet his birth father for the first time. I am in awe when I see Ethan, now a teenager, with his family today and it makes me so happy to see how much they love him. I am stronger today because of my decision. Adoption Link was there with me through it all. Naomi has a heart of gold and would have done anything to help me. Adoption Link was always just a phone call away throughout the entire process. Now I help Adoption Link by offering to share my adoption story with those birth parents and adoptive families who are preparing for adoption journeys of their own.”
“Naomi is an angel. She helped me emotionally when I was at my lowest, and still today, 14 years later, she is here for me emotionally. You can tell she is genuine and has true compassion for me as the birth mother, the adoptive families and the beautiful babies born into our grace. I never take it for granted God putting her in my life or the choice I made to give life to not only a baby but an entire family!”
“The compassion, care and empathy Naomi gave me at my time of confusion, panic, and fear was more than I have ever received from anyone in my life. The parents to my baby are two of the most amazing people and are full of a love and passion to just live that seems fairytale. The choice that I made was not easy but was by far the best gift I could give her. Life. Not just life but an incredible life that I never would have been able to provide her. Sometimes the best way to love someone is to remove yourself from their life. Not one day goes by I don’t think about her but I know one day she will understand and be thankful for the life God has given her and her beautiful family.”
“The support from Adoption Link has never ended. I have had consistent support and contact with Naomi when I reach out for it — she instantly responds with open arms and heart. Everything happens for a reason sometimes the things we think seem so dark give light to another life (literally in this sense). I thank God for leading me to Adoption Link and even more so to the family that has my beautiful baby girl. What I chose helped two very special people start their dream family and to be able to be proud of that is nothing short of breathtaking.’
“As a single mother, facing an unplanned pregnancy, most of the time I felt alone. When I contacted Adoption Link, all of that changed. The social worker from Adoption Link cared about me as well as helped me make a decision regarding my unborn child. Adoption Link has been available to me whenever I needed help. My adoption plan could not have been better, my son is with a family that loves and cares about him. They have left the doors open so that I can have contact with him. Thanks, Adoption Link!”
– Dana, age 25
“I was lucky to have found Adoption Link. The social worker responded to me immediately and together we looked through the family profiles and found a wonderful family. I have a greater peace of mind knowing that my baby is safe and happy.”
– Lakina, age 18
“I was scared to mention adoption at the hospital, but I knew that I had to start the process. I chose to work with Adoption Link and the social worker came to see me right away. She stayed with me until all my questions were answered. I met the adoptive family that I chose and am thankful for them and for adoption. I feel good about my adoption decision.”
– Tina, age 21
“I didn’t tell anyone that I was pregnant. After I had my daughter, I left the hospital the next day. I was so glad that the social worker from Adoption Link had explained everything to me. I was able to get back to my life and not worry. I know my daughter is happy. I am so glad that I chose adoption for her. The support I got from Adoption Link was awesome.”
– Jessica, age 22
Adoption Link serves birthparents throughout the United States. Call 1-800-643-3356.